They say that most successful people have a tortured past. A bitter beginning. Some extreme set of circumstances that shaped them, forged them and made them rise above all. They’ve seen the worst, felt the worst and decided to put a step forth and fight. Their burning desire to challenge the world which wronged them, has driven them to the very top.
Unfortunately (or fortunately?) I’m not one of those people…
Ingredients of Success?
There are many things that makes a winner. Genetics, positive influence, and better luck are namely few. But there is another very important ingredient that we shouldn’t forget, which not only makes a winner but also helps to sustain and amplify the success as well.
It is non other than “Drive” or “Motivation”. Drive is what wakes you up early in the morning to start the work. Drive is what push you to work few more minutes in late night even though your eyes have given up for the day. Drive is what keeps tab of your progress and asses if you’re on the right path to your goal. Drive is what keeps you going when everything seems to be falling apart.
And most importantly, drive is what rids you of the major negative force against your success — procrastination.
The next thing I’m about to tell can be bit controversial and I’m sure many might disagree with me on this. But remember… this is the little grey book. Not black; but not white either. So here it is…
I strongly believe that the foundation for a person’s undying drive, is laid down by his bitter or tortured beginning.
Before you scroll down to the comment section, consider this.
It is a fact that we biologically remember bad feelings more distinctly than good feelings. It’s a fundamental survival mechanism. That’s the reason why your great great ancestors didn’t go to the wild in the middle of the night if they had a craving for blue berries.
So wouldn’t it make sense to say that you’d remember a past major negative reinforcement and drive your decisions (for better or for worse)?
Also it’s important to note that — I’m not saying that everyone with tortured past will succeed. A=>B doesn’t necessarily mean B=>A. Your drive will direct you towards the success or towards any other billions of paths. But if someone IS successful and continuing to be so, it is most probable that he is driven by negative reinforcement, rather than positive reinforcement.
So let’s get to the big question. Is it safe to say that, if you had a tortured past, you have better odds of succeeding?
Playing the hand dealt to you by God
Saying you haven’t had a torturous past to help you succeed is like saying you’re not on wheelchair to be able to use the cool ramp. Looking back hindsight of someone’s success, it is easy to point out how his past helped his present. But is it the correct interpretation?
How many of the thousands of children in bad neighbourhoods, succeed? Not a lot!!
As we discussed earlier, there are multiple, very complicated requirements for success and it also changes from person to person.
We’ve all being blessed with good cards and cursed with bad cards in this f**ed up game of life. How you play your hand is all that matters.
If you had a horrible past, and you need to show the world what you are made of — great. You have the drive. Now collect as much as of the other ingredients and build your beautiful house upon that foundation.
If you had a great past, with loving friends and family, and enough money that you never felt hunger — that’s also great. You have collected some good ingredients of positive influence, positive reinforcement, help and money to bootstrap your life, and a brighter view of the world. Now find a drive. Put a foundation under your castle in the air, so it would not fall apart when things get worse. Your drive might be the fact that you were never appreciated for your own accomplishments, but recognised for your family’s. Or it might be a thought that if you utilise everything you have right now, you might be able to put the humanity leaps and bounds forward. Whatever it might be, find it and find it quickly. At least, that’s what I’m going to do.
Whatever happened — happens — or will happen, remember this…
You are Responsible for Your Life. You can blame the god or the world if you fail. But NO ONE CARES. The world will move on without you.
Ok then.. Now that’s out of the way… Let’s play the game, shall we? Your turn…